Procrastination is a bitch!


This time three years ago, I went for my first smear test. The gynae I visited was shocked at me having left it for so long, and gave me a stern warning not to dismiss the tests as being unimportant or irrelevant. I remember sitting down and telling him about my heavy periods, which were also painful and very uncomfortable. I went in thinking he would prescribe me the Pill and that would be it. The pain would lessen, the moods would better and ‘the flow’ would be milder.

But I was wrong.

After the smear test, he suggested an ultrasound, which I agreed to. After prepping me up, he started looking around, then suddenly stopped and switched the machine off. At that moment, I knew something was not right, and in fact, he informed me, in the very nonchalant way he has of speaking (which can be either very reassuring or terrifyingly scary), that I had a fibroid growing on the side of my uterus. And it was not small. Just about 6cm x 8cm big.

Never having heard of a fibroid, nor knowing its’ consequences or reasons for growing, he set about explaining things to me. While no reason exists for it growing and it is not considered serious in the sense that it is no tumor or other terminal ailment, it was there, and it was growing slowly but steadily. In fact due to its’ size, I could feel it when pressing on my tummy, and it explained the pain and the heavy periods I was having each month. I was told that I was lucky by its’ position and that it had not touched the uterus’ inner lining, so everything else was perfectly fine. My gynae suggested I remove it, especially if I was considering having children in the future, since with the pregnancy hormones, the fibroid would continue to grow and basically leave no room for the baby, and as I remember him telling me so clearly “Sure you can get pregnant easily, but you will have little, if any chance of seeing the whole pregnancy through“. I there and then booked an appointment to remove this thing from my body.

I remember going home totally shocked and gobsmacked because what was supposed to be a routine check-up ended up in a discussion with scary words and consequences. My mother booked an emergency appointment with her gynae in the sister island and the day after we went, where everything was confirmed and I was urged to have it removed. And in April of that year, I had the operation done and the fibroid, which by then was 7cm x 9.5cm, was gone.

I was told not to have children for two years after the operation, and I continued checking up everything as regular as ever. And now, with the two years gone, and me pregnant, I am of course happy and relieved that I am pregnant, because the fear of things not working out was always at the bottom of my head whenever I thought of children. However at the same time, I am always a bit anxious before going to every scan or check-up, just in case that darned word ‘fibroid’ comes up again.

The gynae who operated me is my Maltese gynae, and as I said he can be a bit blunt and straight-forward, however I appreciate his honesty and feel totally comfortable with him around, and would not have it any other way. When I had my scan in London, the doctor told me that she could see the fibroid scarring from where it was removed and told me that another small one was present, but reassured me that its’ position and size would not cause any harm whatsoever to me or the baby. So the last time I visited my Maltese gynae, I questioned him like crazy about the ‘new’ fibroid, and he spent the good part of the scan telling me not to worry.

So while I am not seriously worried or constantly thinking about the fibroid, it is always there on some level, and while I am totally enjoying this part of the pregnancy because I have never felt better or healthier, a small part of me wants July to come and pass, so that I know ‘it’ would not have caused any trouble.

Nowadays the C-section scar I have due to the operation has all but healed and nearly disappeared, however as I had been told three years ago, there is a chance of having to give birth by C-section. Personally, as long as everything is okay, I do not mind the slightest. I know what to feel afterwards, I’ve gone through the aches and pains following the operation, although this time round I will hopefully have a baby to show for it 🙂

Procrastination has always been my problem at times, however I am terribly grateful that in this particular instance, everything worked out well.

So far, so good xxx

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3 thoughts on “Procrastination is a bitch!

  1. Pingback: The Taken Decision « Cup of Crazy anyone?!

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