Days with Heels…

I tend to forget that I have been officially unemployed for only two years. In some ways, it seems as if I’ve been a housewife for a much longer time. Please don’t take that to mean that I crazily love being a housewife – I take the most neutral stand possible on that one. Things needs to be done, I do them, not always with the same enthusiasm. But the upside of being a full-time housewife is also being a full-time mummy, and I have to say that nothing is as satisfactory as being able to spend my time with C and enjoying her childhood day by day.

My life as an employed differed a great deal than today’s days. Apart from the routine and working hours, everything else was different. The one thing that stands out from the rest is my wardrobe. Working Josepha never bought printed t-shirts or casual trousers. She rarely wore flat shoes, except for days at the beach. My feet were used to heels and I could wear them everyday from 9 to 7. I used to walk across Victoria running errands for hours, nearly everyday, all day in heels and I never complained. My profession is quite casually-dressed in Gozo but I always dressed up as well as I could. Of course everything was matching, from the colours of the outfit to the make-up to the shoes.

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And today? Let me just say that I’ve discovered and learnt to love Zara’s t-shirts with their quirky prints. Six months after I quit working I became pregnant, and that started my intense love-affair with flats. I have more flat shoes than ever and the last four pairs of boots I bought are all flat. I truly make an effort to wear heels nowadays, and it is not because I don’t like them as a style, it’s simply because I don’t know how to properly walk in them anymore. I feel and probably look like a penguin with a limp. It saddens me when I look at my uber-high heels in Gozo, no longer worn and left to gather dust. I need to get rid of them, but I can’t bring myself to throw them away. It’s silly to say this about an inanimate object, but each pair of shoes holds a memory, and for that reason they will stay there for the time being.

My days are different, my style is different, but fragments of the ‘old’ me are still there. And on certain days I do indulge that aspect of myself. Whenever I can, I make that extra bit of effort. I put on smart pair of trousers, a ‘tailored’ top and put unhurried make-up on. I unearth my old accessories and change my handbag and feel like my old self again. And even if it’s just a visit to the local supermarket, it’s a good feeling looking fresh and feeling decent.

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Living in England doesn’t help at all because you can wear whatever you like here and no one will bat an eyelid. Everything is more relaxed here. Whereas in Malta my wardrobe used to be divided into working clothes, casual home clothes and Saturday night outfits, over here I have my casual clothes and less casual clothes. I always have to remind myself when in Malta, that the style is that bit more polished and ‘rigid’ so to say. I can get away with a lot more here than in Malta!

I do miss my ‘old’ style. I miss the time I had in getting ready to go out and having reason to look smart for the day. And there it is. The magic word – time. If I had more of it, I’d be that more efficient. I wouldn’t find excuses not to dress up or put make-up on.

Now it’s time to get off this thing and move myself to the bathroom. That day-cream won’t be applied by itself.

Has this happened to you as well? Did having children and staying at home change your style radically? And how do you rid yourself of the comfortable and relaxed routine you’ve suddenly adopted?


12 thoughts on “Days with Heels…

  1. Mine changed when I moved back to Gozo. Well, I did move a week before Maia was born, so I guess it also changed because of her. I still wore tailored clothes and suits and heels for the first 1.5 years of her life because I still worked in Malta, but once I quit that job, it was all jeans and T-shirts. And yes, I miss dressing up A LOT.

  2. I’m looking forward for a wedding we have coming up next weekend and for December – I get to dress up properly πŸ™‚ And I’m baby-less for the wedding as well – woo hoo!!

  3. I wore heels for the first time since New Years (yes New Years!) last weekend at my bosses party. Surprisingly my feet weren’t killing me but I chose heels that were comfortable & high because I knew it could have been a disaster.

    I agree, it seems as if there is an unwritten rule here in Malta to always ‘dress up’ and I’m getting a bit tired of it. I haven’t done it in a while myself, I’ve sort of given up. And if i’m honest, I’m sort of looking forward to being in the UK where I can go back to still looking good but dressing more comfortable and not have to worry about dressing in short tight things with huge heels lol

    • It’s nice here in that aspect because everything goes. You can go out for dinner in a Saturday night in trainers and torn jeans and no one will look at you any differently!

  4. I’m quite happy to hear I’m not the only one who now walks like a klutz in heels. I do try, but omg it’s so much more practical (*CRINGE*) to wear flats!!

    Re clothes in England, tbh it’s one of the things I’m looking forward to going back to Malta for…. the need to dress up, and to make an effort. It’s so easy to let go here and walk around looking like a tramp half the time (esp when you’re either pregnant or carrying baby weight and have no idea what suits you to begin with). Recently I’ve started making an effort just to add a pair of earrings to an outfit and already that’s made a huge difference to the way I feel!

    • That’s exactly what I mean! It’s one of the things I love about visiting Malta – I get to be ME again πŸ™‚ I put on accessories and make-up and feel normal!

  5. once upon a time i’d look at a pair of high heels and think ‘ if they dont give me gangrene by the end of the night then they arent good enough’. now, horror of horrors i look at a pair of shoes and think
    a) can i run in them
    b) will i get enough wear out of them (now unemployed for the most part i dont have oodles of cash to spend on a ‘who cares if they dont anything… i want them!’ pair of shoes

    depressing! where am i?????? plus dont mention the baby weight – i’ve lost almost all of it but am somehow bigger and flabbier so once in a while i look through my old stuff and sniffle!

  6. Pingback: Our ‘Crazy’ Weekend | Cup of Crazy!

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