We are here! It’s been nearly a week since we landed in Malta, this time with no planned return to England. It’s been a tough week, every little thing seems to be playing up a bit and we’ve already used the ‘To-Be-Back-In-England…’-Card a couple of times. I am keen on being immensely optimistic and am constantly envisioning the legendary full-cup instead of a parch-dry one we’re dealing with at times. I am trying to be cheerful when I feel like banging my head against the wall when faced with certain situations. Within 24 hours of arriving, our internet was working in intervals, my mobile suddenly stopped, the iPad’s screen changed colour – anyways, suffice it to say that life’s forces seem keen on testing our nerves.
Leaving England was a million times worse than I ever thought it would be. The goodbye to my dear friends that I wanted to avoid at all costs, happened and we all ended up keen on getting drunk, crying and with running mascara. Closing the doors to our house (ex-house…) was heart-breaking and we left with so many memories of that place. Even talking about it now chokes me up, and I will never think about England again without a thankful heart and a lifetime of gratitude.
Reuniting with C was perfect. I wish I could say that we had a film-like moment when we saw eachother from across the room and she came running into our arms. Alas, all we got was a look, a millisecond of confusion in her eyes and then back to cuddling nanna. Then came a couple of days of following us around all the time, some tears came as well, and now it seems as she’s finally coming round to this new way of living. Of not being in the same couple of rooms for days at end, and suddenly meeting her family so much more often and for long periods of time. She’s a ray of sunshine and her smile and cheerful nature are contagious.
Her smile pushes us forward during trying times.
We’ve had good times. I’ve already met some of my friends for a quick coffee and chat, we met up with other mummies for a charity walk, and the sense of familiarity with everything is as comforting at times as it is suffocating at others.
But I’m focusing on the positive, on the here and now. We’re telling ourselves time and time again that any change needs a period of adjustment which is not easy. And I guess this is ours.
So in the meantime we’ve unpacked our car (it’s amazing how much a sports car can hold!!), our boxes have arrived in Malta (it seems they’re taking their time to get to Gozo!) and our home is becoming more and more cozy and ‘us’. We have dinner dates with friends planned out and are living each day as it comes.
And adjusting. There’s more and more of that to come…