Wallowing in self-pity has never been my thing. These past six weeks have been very long and anything but easy, and I have found myself behaving in a way I hate most in others – I was starting to act all resigned to the fact that my life is all about sadness and doom with no visible exit outlet to get out. And in the midst of this terrible self-pitying I suddenly realized that the end to all this is nigh, this week in fact, and this realization has helped me sit up straight, wash my face with ice-cold water and rid myself of the negativity I allowed myself to be engulfed in. It is disturbingly easy to waste precious time rotting away in self-pity, to whine about life’s tragedies to others and without perhaps knowing it you start alienating the closest people around you, because come on, in all honesty, with life and all its happenings who wants to surround themselves with anything but positivity?
A has been away for over a month. Six weeks to be precise. Our carefully laid-out plan did not work out the way we wanted and we were thrown out in deep seas without preparation. In a week’s time we managed to find a solution but the event made us realize that as much as you plan things, you never have the final say over anything. We expected life to follow our carefully set-out plans – we could not have been more foolish. The minute A left everything starting happening. Problems we did not even know about started to pop out, and although much-needed and much-appreciated help was at hand, all that plus a young toddler and a new house to run all alone, proved a bit too hard for me.
Now things have started calming down again. A returns back to us this week and an exciting couple of weeks await us.
I don’t want to be the negative one, the moan-and-groan blog who complains about everything and rues life. That is not me. And with my timely wake-up call I heard about some news which put everything in clear perspective, which made me face-palm myself and take up a new lease for life.
So it’s now back to the old me, the ‘me’ I’m most familiar and comfortable with. I already feel better with this mental cleansing exercise and I’m determined that everyday from now onwards will definitely be a good one.