My Free Spirit


My Munchkin

You’re going through a particular phase. You always were on the lively side. You were never one to stay still and gaze out in quiet silence. You always loved exploring and looking out for things which would fascinate you. But now…ah now you’re ten times for explorative and a hundred times more lively.

We call you naughty at times, but more than naughty I think that the simple things bore you. You always want something new which will boggle your little brain, get you thinking and expanding your thoughts that bit more.

You are tiring and physically draining. There are times when you reach my patience limit and I do snap at you. I instantly regret it, but you know which buttons to press and oh do you press them!

Today someone called you a ‘free spirit’ and that’s just what you are. You do things your way. You have a particular way of playing, more often than not by yourself. You do not like people coming up to you and instead of a normal hello, you greet them with a scream. When people ignore you, you start repeating ‘hello lady’ up until they respond back. You love running. You can run for hours and I swear you’d still find the energy to run for a bit more! You never stop for one bit and your favourite thing to do is running wild amongst fields and abandoned paths. You get dirty, you fall down and laugh and you shake your head around to feel your hair beat against your face. We visit beaches to let you run free and you end up like this:

Yesterday

Yesterday

And this:

Today

Today

I sometimes think that we’re doing something wrong. I see other children your age who seem to love their pushchair, who can sit still for hours and remain quiet and who never EVER scream. Probably not even under coercion. I look at you and your hair is always a mess, you hate anything or anyone constraining you in any way and you can scream like the wildest maniac on the planet whenever you get frustrated or bored.

And then you have moments when you come for a hug, when you tell me that you love me ‘to the moon and back’ and when you settle down for your bottle and we share the few precious moments of peace we ever have throughout the day. And I start wondering why and how I can ever get angry at you.

I have had people giving me the-raised-eyebrow-look, today an English idiot told you that you were causing ‘a little racket’ and mummies with young babies look at me silently saying that their child will never be behaving like that, not ever.

Probably not. Admittedly you’re not the quietest toddler around. But you are the most loving, the most caring and affectionate one I know of. And if all that love comes with some screams and awful tantrums, some tears on both our parts and some doubts on mine as to what I’m doing wrong, it does not matter at all.

I think how two years of you have changed and altered my whole life as I knew it before then. I think of how this time next year you will no longer be my baby but you’ll be a schoolgirl and I will lose a small part of you forever. I think how much at times I look forward for an evening out with papa’ alone and when that happens all I can think of is you.

You are my free-spirited girl. Not everyone gets you at times, not even me! But I’m learning to let you run free, get dirty and be happy. If that is who you are, we love you more for it. And if being like that brings us stern looks and smirks, then bring them on.

Just give us a breather every once in a while 😉

Mama…

 

 

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5 thoughts on “My Free Spirit

  1. was it an old English idiot? a few weeks ago and old idiot came to help Anthony get into the car (I had my hands full with E. the old idiot could barely walk himself, but anyway). then the idiot told me ‘he cant get in because of all the junk. I’ve never seen so much junk’ (the ‘junk’ was 3 Tupperware containers on his car seat. and yes, I have a messy car). My E is, ahem, spirited. Anyone who thinks they can tame her can happily take her for a few days. C looks like FUN! pushchair loving kids are boring (at least that’s what I tell myself!) I am sick of getting ‘well-meaning’ middle aged women telling my E ‘int imqarba. x’fik’ which in my eyes translates to ‘inti trid xeba’.

    • Must have been the same idiot! At this point I don’t really care what others think – it’s just the effect it has on me at times. I need to learn to stay calmer and refine my ‘ignore’ ability. It’s quite sharp at this point, just needs that bit more tuning 😉

  2. Pingback: Horrors | Cup of Crazy!

  3. Thank you for sharing – I love reading honest post. I can relate to this and I understand. It made me feel emotional even. My daughter is the same – there is something about her. She is amazing and exhausting all together. How old is your daughter? Mine just turned two and she has been this way since birth. Very sweet and loving but always on the go.

    • Thanks Deb! She turned two last July so that makes her a couple of months older than Sixtine. I just read your post – I’ve been there, when sometimes it all feels a bit too much all at once. Just hang in there and get out of the house. Go out for a long walk with the kids and refresh your mind. Take care xxx

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